Mini Music Movie Review: The Bodyguard (1992)

The_Bodyguard_1992_Film_Poster

I suppose you can call this movie a classic, especially now that Whitney Houston has died, but it’s not necessarily the best movie you could watch. Even though the music was phenomenal and led to some of Houston’s biggest hits, including “I Will Always Love You,” the story line and the acting is pretty shit. Houston was an amazing singer, but actress not so much. But if you’re bored and don’t mind wasting two hours of your day, then it could be pretty fun as long as you’re not taking it too seriously.

In the movie, Houston played an international pop star (how far fetched) who had a crazed stalker. This is where Kevin Costner comes in, a guy whose previous job found him protecting past presidents before a mishap got him babysitting a bratty singer. I guess Costner isn’t that bad, but I can’t really tell if his stilted, cold deliverance is him in character or him being a crappy actor. Then again, I really haven’t seen him in anything else. But Houston does her best to be the stereotypical, independent diva who doesn’t need anyone to protect her. You would think that since Houston was playing the role of a diva she would do a fairly good job, but the flat tone in her voice, her overacting, and her heartless emotion is enough to drive you crazy. Sure, you can deal with it for an hour or so, but after that you’re ready for the crazed stalker to come and get her.

Of course the best parts of the movie are the one where Houston sings. Okay, so she’s actually miming the lyrics, but the passion she puts behind it is really convincing; she’s in her element here and she lets it shine. One part of the movie that always sticks out in my mind is when she sings “Queen of the Night” and she’s in this awesome outfit that’s part cyber woman part Cleopatra. For some reason this has always been my favorite outfit of the entire movie and whenever I think of the singer it’s the first image that comes to mind. Either way any Houston fan will love any scene where she’s on stage because she owns it. It just reminds you of why she was and still is one of the most respected singers around.

Like I mentioned earlier, if you don’t take the movie seriously you can still manage to have a good time. It’s bad enough that the whole movie is contrived, I mean there is a scene where the stalker tries to kill her kid by exploding a boat he’s on, but there are some scenes that have such a serious tone to them that you can’t help but laugh. One of my favorite parts is when the singer is getting ready for a performance when the phone rings. She picks it up and for some reason thinks the obviously 40 year old creepy guy who replies “Mommy?” is her son. She excitedly says “Fletcher?!” to which the stalker responds in the weirdest and cheesiest voice ever “Nooo! Nooooo!” It’s the weirdest and most hilarious scene in the movie; it almost makes the whole movie worth it.

If you enjoy Whitney Houston and/or bad movies, then check out this film when you’re bored at home and don’t mind wasting away two hours. It’s not even one of those bad movies that’s fun to watch. Sure, there are moments that are funny, but it’s almost painful to sit through Houston and Costner’s stiff acting. If anything, this movie does not motivate you to watch the Whitney Houston vehicle Waiting to Exhale, unless you want to torture yourself.

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