Four years ago…

MJJI’ve been a Michael Jackson fan ever since I can remember. I don’t how I discovered the singer, but I remember enjoying his music since about 5 years old. Something about him spoke to me: the music was fun, catchy, and made me want to dance, and his videos were dazzling. I was always amazed by his sequins and sparkles that he seemed to have on everything. I used to imagine him in his house looking through his closet full of his past outfits and maybe just strutting around the house with them on because he’s Michael

For some reason I fell in love with one version of Michael in particular: Bad. It was my favorite album then and it’s still my favorite now. I always longed to have the outfit he wore in the video and I memorized every word to the Moonwalker movie. I remember seeing a commercial for the Moonwalker game and every day I hoped I would get it for my Genesis. Because of his generosity, skilled dancing, amazing voice, and all around kind nature I wanted to marry MJ. He was my first love, well maybe it was Macaulay Culkin, but that made it better because they hung out together!

I would be lying if I said I didn’t notice the color of his skin changing. I still hold it that it doesn’t matter what he did to himself; it doesn’t change the fact that he was a brilliant musician. I only mention it because the way I understood the change was that he willed it that way. I always thought MJ was some sort of magical being and he just decided he wanted to look different and POOF his skin color changed. But it didn’t make him any more or less talented. He was the same old Michael, he just looked different.

Of course I was heartbroken when he died. I’ll never forget when I got the phone call from my mom, who was bawling on the other line. All she kept saying is “Michael’s dead!” I didn’t want to believe it. I searched the internet for answers until I realized she wasn’t lying. After I found out, I sat there dazed as if I were in some dream. When it finally hit me that he was really gone, the tears streamed down my face. He was gone for good.

Some people didn’t understand why I was crying for someone I didn’t know. Sure, I never met him. Hell, I never even got to see him live, but in a way I grew up with him. His music was always around me. Even when I got older and my music taste started to change I didn’t listen to him as much, but I never abandoned him. And everyone in my family loved him. There was nothing better than gathering around the TV waiting for a new video from him to come on or watching one of his concerts.

I remember my mom and I used to watch every award show just see if he would pop up somewhere. My favorite moment is when we were watching the 2001 VMA’s. I was an Nsync fan (of course) so I was enjoying a colorful rendition of “Pop.” Suddenly, everything on stage stopped and out pops Michael Jackson. My mom and I couldn’t stop screaming and freaking out. And that’s what we loved about him. It didn’t matter what he looked like or what he was doing: as soon as we saw him a freak out commenced. That’s why when he died it felt like I lost someone really close to me.

I cried my tears and sometimes listening to certain songs of his will bring the pain back, but after he passed I thought he can finally get some peace. That’s why it angers me that people won’t leave him alone even after death. Everyone knows the later years weren’t kind to him. I don’t want or need to go into detail about what happened. I just think it’s sad that he can’t shake these accusations even after death. More lawsuits have popped up, more accusations made, and so many more issues with money, which is what it’s all about. The man is dead and no one can seem to leave his life or his family alone and it saddens me. Michael was a hard worker; he’s deserves his rest like everyone else.

Even if you do believe all the stuff that’s been said about him, forget about that for a moment. Think back to when you enjoyed a song of his. When it made you dance and sing; when it made you do your best moonwalk. Just think about how happy his music made you; forget all the bullshit that came later. This is what Michael deserves to be remember for. His personal life should not deter from the fact that he was the greatest musician of all time. It’s been 4 years since he died. Instead of remembering everything bad that happened to him or crying, let’s celebrate his life by listening to his music. Put on your favorite video or album by him and just be happy for his sake.

Michael Jackson, 1991

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